Recently Bart and I have made the "big step", moving in together. Now I will be honest it is not my first time living with a boyfriend, with that said both times have been pretty daunting. Seeing as though it is two completely different individuals trying to find harmony. It doesn't happen very easily, just ask anyone who has embarked on this journey. You see habits you might be like eeeeeuw about. Like socks laying everywhere or going to bed with a perfectly clean kitchen only to wake up finding it in a total mess. Drives me banana's!
But for me the greatest challenge has been trying to feel at home. Feeling comfortable when nothing is as you used to it. There's no privacy, you have twice the amount of chores. You cant just cook what you craving or being told every idea you have for decorating is way to girly these are just to give you a few examples. Things change. A whole lot. Now while I am still trying to find my sweet spot here I do find comfort in holding onto things I did at my home. Like how I enjoy my Sundays, staying in bed if its raining and grey out with a good series playing back to back. Drives Bart insane. But it also keeps me from wanting to run back home all the time. Everything is a trial and error kind of feeling. Just telling the truth here.
- Still do things you love. Don't now forget about what makes you happy, champagne and pizza nights while watching Style network or if you like me switching off in front of series. Don't just try to act like now you cool with watching sports all day all night or any of those manly things. Try to hold onto something that brings you home and makes you feel at home.
- New bedding! Maybe your pink sheets wont work and maybe his red sheets wont work (what is with men and red sheets btw) , so why not get something fresh and new.
- Discuss everything. If you need more help say it. Voice it. This is your space too. You should be happy anywhere you spend most of your time.
- Space! space will work wonders. Trust me the bf might not want to watch your series with you, he might not get why you need to make a tiny cheese plate while you drink your wine. So create a nice space where you can indulge in what you want without burdening him.
- Show gratitude for shared tasks. If you not getting any gratitude it turns into resentment. Thank you and helping where you can is important. House chores are never fun so when its appreciated it makes it worth it.
- Don't forget the romance. This is one thing I have noticed that kind of dies down... I'm still trying to figure out why or how to fix, any suggestions? if I figure it out I will let you know.
- Stop being territorial. Whether you moving in with your partner or him with you or in together some place new realize someone is feeling out of their comfort zone. Be more WE instead of I. Don't throw the "this is my home, my way" because then whats the point of taking this next step. Be understanding. Be kind.
These are just some things I have noticed and you know your girls gotta share this information with you. Please let me know if you would like me to keep sharing a few updates every now and then on this new change in my life. The reality of what moving in together is really like. I will finally leave you with this fun read The 5 stages of moving in with your boyfriend
~Image source: Cupcakes and cashmere~