Today I have something super special to share with you about how I recently started using the Tonglen meditation method in my everyday life. Now I literally found out about this through the women entrepreneur conference I attended about a week or more ago and at first I thought oh sounds too easy, it cant possibly work. Firstly let me just say I am usually the most optimistic person in the room. I always try to see the positive in every situation.
However recently my mind frame had changed. Hello miss Debbie downer. Like one example is I got some super harsh critique about my blog from a loved one like "you are a terrible writer, no one will ever read your blog, readers wont come back" kind of harsh. Needless to say it brought me to tears and I eventually couldn't find the courage to blog. A few weeks went by before I decided I have to try something to get me out of my funk because each day from then on just felt like I was sinking more and more into a space where the only things that captured my focus were the negative things. Not that I am putting blame on the critic at all, my mind frame was negative. I chose to keep focusing on the negative. Which was my own fault, my own doing.
As many of you might know or experienced when you in a negative mind frame anything and everything can ruin even the most perfect of days, even the girl who is just sitting there innocently eating a cracker will annoy you and you will be like "look at this *%#@h eating that cracker like she owns every cracker in the world" haha. So with nothing to lose I decided to try the Tonglen method, now please forgive me if I get something incorrect or should I say not as perfect as those who have practiced this method for years but this is one example of how I used this meditation technique in my life:
- Feel the pain : I sat down and went back to the situation, hearing the harsh words, feeling the tears starting to build up. I felt every emotion like it had just happened.
- Think about others who might be in the same situation: I started to think about other bloggers out there who had gotten their fair share of harsh words.
- Send out positive thoughts: I then sent out thoughts of appreciation, care and compassion their way, I thought about what I felt would cheer me up in those sad moments and sent those kind thoughts their way.
These 3 simple steps now allows me to deal with emotions instead of just sweeping them under the rug. Adding the Tonglen meditation to my everyday life helps me feel better because not only am I dealing with my own pain, but I am sending out positive energy to people who might be feeling the same kind of hurt. I have now done this with a few other negative situations these last few days and it has repeatedly proven it works. Maybe you have been feeling like you can only focus on the negative parts of your life or perhaps like you can't get over harsh words/situations/thoughts, I highly recommend you try this. You don't need a fancy meditation room or to sit in a meditation like "pose". All you need is to take a moment for yourself it can be in the bath or shower or while drinking your morning coffee.
Have you ever tried the Tonglen meditation method? Will you give it a try?
~Image credit: World tour stories~